Rekindle
by a simple kind of lovely
Summary: Three years ago, Lily lost her son, home, money, husband, and dignity. She’s still trying to rebuild her life when she starts teaching. It doesn’t help that her second marriage fails and she ends up teaching her first husband's son, Harry Potter. JL
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **Rekindle

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, sadly.  
**Genre:** Romance/General  
**Rating:** T  
**Summary: **Three years ago, Lily lost her son, home, money, husband, and dignity. She's still in the process of rebuilding her life, when she becomes a kindergarten teacher for young magical children. It doesn't help at all that her 2nd marriage fails and she ends up teaching her son, Harry Potter.

-&-

_(Three Years Ago)_

"We have gathered today in the court the divorce finalization of James Potter and Lily Evans, due to marital unfaithfulness from the former and marital detachment from the latter," the judge said, before pausing and droning on about what the divorce meant to the future ex-couple.

James Potter shifted. The divorce lawyer he had gotten was a good one, helping him win the property and custody of their son, Harry. However, he was still uncertain about the victories. It seemed his soon-to-be ex-wife was not trying at all. A few weeks ago, she had said if she could not keep her son for more than an hour each week, she should not even go see her son at all. The property was easy, as well, with Lily agreeing he should keep the house and the account they shared in Gringotts was his. She did not accept his offers for alimony and had remained passive through the whole ordeal, her eyes the only things alive about her.

When it was over, the Marauders stood around Lily, trying to say goodbye. Even though they said they would still talk to her, the redhead intuitively knew they would not. This was because James was their leader and since he had stopped talking to her quite a bit ago, she knew they would first take some time out to have a lunch with her. Then they would stop making dates as often, until the time came for them to slowly drift away. She would never talk to them again after that, even though they had been almost her brothers.

As it was courtesy, she shook Peter Pettigrew's hand and then hugged Remus Lupin and Sirius Black tight before letting go. She readjusted the bag on her shoulder and walked out, waving absentmindedly at her now ex-husband. Her things were in the hotel across the street and she was checking out today.

_Now_, she thought, _where was she going to go?_

-&-

_(Now)_

"We are here today to finalize the divorce between Amos Diggory and Lily Evans, due to the abuse the former had done to the latter," a different judge announced, after she took a glance at the couple.

Amos Diggory looked like an obnoxious athlete with bulging muscles. On the other hand, Lily Evans looked very frail and tiny – due to all the bruises that took over on her arms and face.

As they sat down, Lily's lawyer, Remus Lupin, patted her knee in reassurance. As predicted, Lily had lost contact with Sirius and Peter, only still friends with Remus on his insistence. Lily had been glad when he accepted the notion of being her divorce lawyer for a divorce that had not included James and Lily both. He had been neutral throughout the turbulent turn the marriage had taken for his two closest friends, not becoming one of their lawyers for fear of them fighting more. He knew if he had said yes to James, he knew that Lily would have been shocked and angry that he was going to help James, even when he was in the wrong. He also knew if he had taken Lily's side, James would have thought him not a true brother Marauder, and he would have lost his tightest ring of people he loved.

When they heard, "Meeting adjourned," Remus helped Lily to the door.

"So, how are you feeling now?" he asked her cautiously, subtly looking over the bruises that plagued the visible parts of her body.

"I feel happy," she said, "So relaxed."

"You want me to drive you home?"

"No thanks, I'll take the tube," she replied and started to leave in a similar fashion she had done three years ago.

"But it's so dark outside –"

"Remus. I'll be fine. I'm a big girl and I can take care of myself."

-&-

The redhead shivered. Why had she not brought an extra jacket? She was so cold and wished for the soft upholstery and warmth of Remus' vehicle. She had just missed the last train, coming out and walking slowly as she thought about how the remarriage was a mistake. She and Amos Diggory had dated before and they had an okay chemistry, but that did not really say she had had to marry him, right? He had practically forced her to take the ring, buttering up his sadistic plan with fickle.

She went back up to the streets, looking around for a place to buy a warm drink. As Lily waited for the cars to stop so she could run across, a minivan pulled up beside in front of her.

It was James Potter, her ex-husband.

"Lily?" he asked, rolling down the window.

"Um, hi James," she said nervously.

"What are you doing out in this cold?" he admonished, "Come on, I'll drive you home."

"Okay, I guess," she said uncertainly, as she got into the front seat. Five-year-old Harry occupied the back, sleeping.

"How are you these days," he asked, looking at her bruises.

"Tired, but I'm fine, as always," she cheerfully replied.

They both tried to figure out what to say next, but neither could think of something. The rest of the ride was in silence. James focused on driving and Lily stared out of her window, not showing her face had reddened. When she had seen him, it was like she had a school crush on him all over again.

As they neared the address she had requested, she gathered her things. When the car stopped, she leaned over and absentmindedly kissed the corner of his mouth.

"Thank you, James," she said, before leaving.

It wasn't until way after, when they were both in their beds, staring at the ceiling, that they realized that was the most contact they had with each other since the divorce three years ago.

-&-


	2. Chapter 2

**Title: **Rekindle

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, sadly.  
**Genre:** Romance/General  
**Rating:** T  
**Summary: **Three years ago, Lily lost her son, home, money, husband, and dignity. She's still in the process of rebuilding her life, when she becomes a kindergarten teacher for young magical children. It doesn't help at all that her 2nd marriage fails and she ends up teaching her son, Harry Potter.

-&-

_I was born the day you kissed me_

_And I died inside the night you left me_

_But I lived, oh how I lived,_

_While you loved me_

"While You Loved Me" – Rascal Flatts

-&-

James groggily walked to the kitchen where Harry was already eating cereal. An owl flew by with the Prophet and James absentmindedly read the front page some journalist, Rita Skeeter, had written.

When James finished reading the tiny little caption there, he reread it a second time to fully understand it.

A third time.

A fourth time.

Finally at the fifth, he understood.

-&-

Potter's Ex Ditches Another One 

_As we all know, the heir to the Potters' fortune, James Potter, married a redhead, Lily Evans, not too long ago. Why do I bring this up, you may ask? Well, this is because we all know about their divorce, as well. Well, here it is, folks. Lily Evans (ex-Potter) has divorced her second husband, Amos Diggory. With a guy like him, you would think that man was the cause of her and Potter's divorce. She was seen yesterday exiting – for the second time – the divorce courts. What a scarlet woman. Marrying and divorcing has become her habit, no?_

_In the first divorce, Evans' and Potter's divorce, she gave him the child, property …_

_Continues on page seven._

-&-

He had driven a Lily_Evans_ home! Last, he had heard of her before yesterday, she had been married to some athletic brute named Diggory – one of her Hogwarts exes before him. He knew that Diggory had proposed to her last year and then they married sometime after that – he had not been invited to the wedding. If he had been invited, he did not know whether he would have gone out of respect or not go because he could not stand seeing the redhead kiss another.

His fellow Marauder, Remus Lupin, had been invited and this was how he was informed of her remarriage. It had only been two years after their divorce and James had still been trying to cope raising a son without a wife. The remarriage, he supposed, had been a very surprising thing to hear of. When the werewolf told him about it, James had been having a very long week. He left his son Harry with his parents and spent the night with an ever-filling bottle of Firewhiskey.

In retrospect, he supposed he should have never drunk through the whole night. He had never prided himself for burying his troubles in alcohol. He did not like to call himself an alcoholic, but he supposed that was the only way to describe those two years after the divorce.

-&-

The divorce.

He couldn't understand why they had split. Their marriage and courtship previous had been both passionate and intense. They had loved each other dearly; they often talked of their futures bound together forever.

They had been so happy, he reminisced as he looked over the pictures in the article labeled, "Potter and Evans: Fairytale Romance". Every picture taken in public was of them laughing, holding hands, or kissing.

What had changed? The first year of marriage had been truly blissful. They began a divorce law firm, "Potter and Potter". This way they both could be lawyers and work together as partners. Every day was very busy, their business was successful, and remained close as ever.

In came the second year of marriage and this is where James supposed trouble started. They were to represent a divorce case on two different sides. It had been very trying, because James believed the husband should give his wife and the four children alimony of around a thousand Galleons a month, because the wife had wealthy grandparents. Lily believed different, that the husband should give more because the wife could not rely on her parents forever.

They bickered endlessly about this case, arguing not only about their difference of opinions, but of each other's views on life. James had always been brought up with punishments being lenient. Lily had grown up where her parents never let her get away with anything.

Finally, Lily struck a fatal blow – the way James' parents spoiled him. His parents _had_ spoiled him a bit, but were still very generous, open people. They did not speak to each other for weeks until Lily decided to use her greatest weapon to bring them back together – pregnancy.

One night when they were civil to one another, they had made up. Six weeks later, she excitedly told him she was pregnant. The baby worked to keep them together, and Lily believed their fight were over. Everyday, James would wake up and kiss her stomach, sometimes putting his hand there to feel the baby's kicks. She would lovingly push his hair back and give him a kiss. This was the way it was for those nine months of pregnancy.

Then after baby Harry was half a year old, there was another fight regarding how Lily had treated one of the newer attorney interns in the firm. Lily had snapped at him, warning he would be fired for that mistake. When they were in the safety of home, James commented to her that she shouldn't have blown up at the intern. She snapped back, saying that mistakes could not always be corrected and he should know to check things over.

At the company dinner that next night, they avoided one another, making pleasant chat with everybody else. James drank too strong of an unknown alcoholic beverage talking to another woman and ended up going at it with her by mistake.

It was very humiliating to take James home, with all the guests knowing what had taken place. James had been too intoxicated to notice anything, as Remus, Sirius, and Peter helped hoist him into their home. They looked at the redhead sympathetically and glared at the drunk, babbling fool that was their friend.

-&-

The next few days Lily had been unreadable. She seemed to shed no tears James had slept with another woman. She did not eat or sleep, either. All she did was work, go home, and hold Harry close. Every time James tried to approach her about it, she turned away from him. Lily began detaching herself from their connection, their life, and their friends.

One day she was gone.

Her clothes, books, and other belongings disappeared. The only thing left that was theirs was Harry, attended to by the neighboring Mrs. Figg. In place of her things was a form for him to sign.

It was a form to separate, with her signature already legibly scripted.

_This was her way to cope._

Being too confused to fight for her, he signed, took the telephone, and called a lawyer.

-&-

_(One and a half years ago, at the firm, where Lily says goodbye)_

All the employees stood in a straight line, all faces solemn as she glanced at them. This was after three weeks of Lily leaving their home. She had come in earlier; announcing her turn at legal practice was over. She was quitting, leaving, and told them she was going to court for the last time in another week. They were welcome to come watch but did not say what the case was.

Even if Lily had snapped at the interns at least twice the whole time they worked there, they still greatly liked and respected her. It truly made them upset when Lily announced she was leaving the firm without James stopping her.

After that painful announcement, she gave out another piece of news – Remus Lupin would be taking over her place in their partnership. Lupin had nodded, his eyes darkened with regret she was doing this.

Then she passed the whole line, a worn, sad smile playing on her lips.

-&-

"Daddy?" The little voice said tentatively, breaking James' reminiscing. He looked from the newspaper back to Harry.

"Yes?"

"I'm ready to go to school now," his son said. Quickly, James glanced at the choice of attire Harry had chosen. He was wearing a neatly pressed dress shirt along with a sweater vest. His pants were clean as well, but then his eyes fell on the shoes. He was wearing his red boots, which would not have been suitable. James grabbed another pair and they walked outside of the flat.

Today was Harry's first day of kindergarten at a primary school especially for a 'magic-accidentals' prone student. The principal had assured James Harry would be fine there, for all the teachers were either of magical blood or had magical knowledge.

His son's room was 203, which he heard from whispering mothers was the room of a new teacher. Apparently, the teacher was a very young and attractive lady who loved all children. However, she was a divorced veteran of two destroyed marriages. Parents outside of the room were whispering how unsure they felt about having a divorced woman – wondering if she was stable enough – teach their children.

Harry and his father walked into the room apprehensively, taking in the scene of crying toddlers clinging desperately onto their adult guardians. Other kids were screaming around, playing with toys. James kissed the black hair on top of Harry's head and left the room. When he was passing, the teacher walked past and he caught a whiff of her perfume.

It was a very airy, lingering, and peaceful scent she left behind. Flowers in the rain … dew left on the petals … 

Then he realized something. The only woman he'd ever found this scent on was …

"Good morning, children. My name is Lily Evans and I will be your kindergarten teacher for the next year. I believe we'll have a lot of fun learning together …"

_Oh, crap._

-&-

Note: I'm really sorry for not updating for so long! Truth is, there is this exam I have to take in less than a week. I've been too busy attending prep classes to write. Today I had some free time so I decided to finish this chapter. I will not be updating until the exam is over (October 28), because this exam is so stressful I haven't slept properly in weeks. Now review please – gives cookies – :D

And please forgive me for such a horrible chapter. I was trying to put up Lily and James' history together, but it was sort of rush-y.


	3. Chapter 3

**Title: **Rekindle

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, sadly.  
**Genre:** Romance/General  
**Rating:** T  
**Summary:**Three years ago, Lily lost her son, home, money, husband, and dignity. She's still in the process of rebuilding her life, when she becomes a kindergarten teacher for young magical children. It doesn't help at all that her 2nd marriage fails and she ends up teaching her son, Harry Potter.

-&-

_Live in the moment, don't pretend  
Let it go and take it in  
You don't have to understand  
The how, why, and when  
What is love?  
But a kiss on a rainy day  
A smile that won't go away  
A safe place to run  
What is love?  
But a complicated simple truth  
A bond between me and you  
The number one_

"What Is Love" – Play

-&-

James froze.

_Maybe it's a different Lily Evans,_ he said to himself, trying to keep calm. _After all, Evans is a pretty common Muggle name …_

The side of his mind known to him as his rationality shot back. _All the teachers here know at least_something_ about the magical world – what are the odds that this Lily Evans is just another person?_

There had never been a 'just' with Lily. He'd loved her once. He'd hurt her once. What was the odds fate was trying to wreak more havoc on his already troubled life?

He took a glance at the teacher.

Red, vibrant hair.

Shapely, small form.

A voice that could pacify a demon.

It was definitely her. He almost panicked as he ran out of the school – away from the school, away from the past, away from her. Right now, he could not care less where he was going.

He just had to _get away_.

-&-

"Good morning, children. My name is Lily Evans and I will be your kindergarten teacher for the next year. I believe we'll have a lot of fun learning together …"

When she said that, she tried to perk up a little – it sounded too formal and robotic. She didn't want to seem like she was only doing this for money – which she wasn't – to some of the parents still in the room.

"Roll call," she announced next, as the children began quieting down.

"Hannah Abbott." A tiny girl raised her hand hesitantly.

"Hermione Granger." A bookish looking girl confidently raised her hand.

"…Draco Malfoy," she said after much pausing. She could recognize him immediately though, which she was not sure of how to react.

Then just after his name, she saw something that seemed to be out of a nightmare. Was she looking at the name correctly? Had Fate just decided to cruelly play a trick on her? Was it really...?

"Harry Potter," she said, breathing shakily. A small hand rose up and Lily had to do a double take. It_was_ her son, after not seeing him for around three years – not counting when James had driven her home.

Now that Harry was wide awake and sitting straight at a desk, she could see how he had grown. His hair had begun to look as tousled as James' had always been and his face was so strikingly recognizable as James Potter's. His form had not yet slumped down to how James had sat in his desk when they were still at Hogwarts. She was pleased to see that Harry had turned out fine without her. What really made her stumble back to reality were his eyes. Last time she had seen him; she had remembered they were a watery green. Now, his eyes were a vibrantly solid leaf-green.

Realizing if she did not budge from her staring her students would think her strange, she quickly snapped out of what seemed to be a trance. She quickly resumed calling out the students' names. She smiled a little inside seeing the next name – she was pleased to see the Weasleys' youngest child was starting school. She wondered if Molly had talked James into sending Harry here – Molly had always seemed to be the matchmaker for anybody. If a husband and wife were arguing, Molly could always soothe them back into love again. She wondered if Molly could have helped, if Molly hadn't been busy with her own pregnancy.

She wondered if they would still be together today. She missed Molly – Molly had been the one to laugh away her fears right before the wedding. Molly had been her confidante – a few times, Arthur and Lily jokingly fought over who got to keep Molly for the night.

-&-

"Class is over," Lily announced to the class. She opened the classroom door and all the kids ran out into the hallway, greeted by their parents with kisses. She watched some pick up their children and swing them around.

When she turned to look at the classroom, she noticed Harry was the only one left. He was sitting quietly at his desk, hands folded.

"Harry, where's your parents?"

"Well, you're here and my dad's late."

Lily inwardly made a face. So Harry knew she was his mother … she wondered what James had said about her.

"Harry, you know I'm not considered your parent. I don't have lawful custody of you."

"What would you call this?"

She hesitated. "I … I don't know. I just know I'm not allowed to take you anywhere without lawful consent."

James dashed into the room, just after all the other parents and students had gone.

"Sorry, I'm late – what do I call you?" he breathed.

"You've known me for a while, James. If I call you James, you can still call me Lily."

"Oh." His appearance was bedraggled; his clothes were out of place and his tie was crooked. "I was too busy trying to get here by Muggle transpo – I lost my way and the car ran over a nail. I spent ten minutes trying to ask some Muggles to help me out with the automobile, but I don't think I asked correctly."

"Well," she tried to stifle a laugh, "you're here now and that's all that matters. You should get going now."

James ushered Harry out of the classroom. On a second thought, James poked his head into the classroom again.

"Listen, Lily," his voice softened, "how about I take you out for a coffee and talk about what's been going on for the past three years? How about it – catching up like old times?"

The redhead looked up and James was surprised to see her movement not steady. "S-s-sorry, I'm too busy nowadays. Maybe another day?"

He nodded quietly, accepting her rejection – the first one in years. "Yeah, I understand."

It was not until he left that she let her body fall onto the chair. Her expression showed she was very shocked and scared.

However, she did not know what made her more scared – the fact James had actually wanted to take her out or the fact that she _wanted_ him to take her out.

-&-

A/N: Yeah, not the best chapter ever… And I'm really sorry for not updating for what? Four months? X.X

I was too busy procrastinating and I had begun a new story of my own works – nothing related to ff. I visited my ff page after a while and noticed I haven't updated since late October. I was in a writing slum…I almost got back on track when leaves at autumn (check out her stories; she's an awesome writer) and I PM'ed back and forth for a bit. She got my mind working for a bit, before I gave up again.

_Then_, a reviewer serindipity demanded me to make another chapter. So yeah. I decided to get off my lazy bum and do this thing. I'm really sorry for not updating. I had gotten into the habit of procrastinating and playing games and writing that special story of mine … I got tired of writing that story for a while and got back to this, which is great since I had a midterm today…

But now that I'm done rattling off lame excuses to cover my laziness and writing a big long lecture on what I was doing, I hope you read and enjoyed it. :D

And I'm really sorry once again for updating so late and for making this chapter so short.

I promise to update quicker. X.x


	4. Chapter 4

Title: Rekindle

**Title: **Rekindle

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, sadly.  
**Genre:** Romance/General  
**Rating:** T  
**Summary: **Three years ago, Lily lost her son, home, money, husband, and dignity. She's still in the process of rebuilding her life, when she becomes a kindergarten teacher for young magical children. It doesn't help at all that her 2nd marriage fails and she ends up teaching her son, Harry Potter.

-&-

James couldn't pinpoint exactly what he was feeling about her 'no' to him asking. He couldn't have helped it either. The words just flowed smoothly off his tongue and right into her ears; the action just seemed natural considering their romantic past. What had he been thinking? Did he _really_ think she was going to say yes to his invitation and get sucked back into that shared world of misery?

She was farther along the road of healing than he was; at least she was trying to move past their marriage. James hadn't really thought anything, talked about, or done something after the divorce. Her space around the house was still there; the empty bookshelves still hadn't been filled; their closet still had her half empty; the dining room still had a spot where she used to sit.

The Marauders didn't comment on how James would walk past the empty spots in the large library, how James would rummage through his clothes messily leaving that half empty, or how he didn't let anybody sit in what used to be Lily's seat when eating. James knew they were worried about him…he had seen how they would whisper quietly while glancing at him.

Sometimes he asked himself why he still left Lily's space alone after three years' separation. James remembered one day he had been ready to organize the house and take advantage of all the room he had, until he was up in the attic. He had been placing different photos and mementos in different piles until he had uncovered a dusty, breaking box. James had opened it before realizing –

_Lily hadn't taken any of the wedding pictures with her._

James had immediately stopped his attempt to clean, going back downstairs dazedly. The attic was strewn with pictures on the floor. That box's pictures were the only ones he brought with him. Immediately he took out the frame of their wizard photo from under the bed. Lily's face smiled and waved with the younger James, as the older James carefully put the frame back on the bedside table. The other wedding pictures were magicked into a photo album, which he took back to the attic.

That was the last time James had thought to take advantage of the space. After finding the wedding pictures, he felt emotionally drained for weeks, like he was dead. It was like seeing those pictures was the divorce hitting on him for the first time.

It hurt.

James had reoccurring dreams where Lily was always showing up back at his house, to take back pictures of when they were together. James always felt threatened in the dreams, because he always said yes; please pick out the ones you want. After Lily awkwardly took all the pictures and was going through the door, his chest always felt like it was being yanked apart. His head started hurting and he suddenly couldn't remember who Lily was – it was like her taking the pictures away took his memories away.

James would wake up with a start and stare at the wedding photo, breathing hard. James would be covered in sweat and he would touch photo Lily's face before going back to sleep and having the same dream again.

James had that for all three years they had been separated. However, the first day he drove her back to her home, he had a sleepless night; mainly because he kept analyzing and re-analyzing about the kiss she had given him. Had she thought about what she was doing? What did she mean? Did she regret doing so?

After seeing her again as Harry's teacher, he didn't have the nightmare for a few days but her 'no' started up his dreams and insomnia again. Could divorce really affect a man this much?

James missed the scent she left on her pillow when they were cuddled up cozily. He also missed how she wasn't hesitant to retaliate back his joking insults or his 'cute little pranks', as she had called them. She wasn't shy around him, even after they had been married and it was their wedding night. Most of all, he had loved how she wasn't always playing the mature one, killing all the fun in their relationship – she was also fun, but never tried to tear James away from the Marauders boys' night or tried to steal his thunder. She hung out with the Marauders a lot, but she didn't do so enough to ever leave her husband out of the circle.

But it was so strange, how easily James brushed it off in fifth year and how he couldn't let it go now, almost ten years later.

Did Lily have _any_thing from their home that told of their marriage? Did she have any pictures she herself had kept in the first place?

He wasn't sure, but when he asked her out, he was almost certain what was on her hand. Or lack of what was on her hand.

She had taken off her wedding ring.

-&-

Had James really expected her to agree to the taking out, considering their romantic past? When Lily had said no, that word felt so unused – which had been rarely used when they had gotten together.

And what about herself? She hadn't expected that question. She had certainly been shocked.

But what about her mind already envisioning the 'yes' that should have been sure to follow? Why did she even want to say yes after what he'd done to her?

Lily was currently at home, trying to relax before teaching the students again. Being in that room had been _draining_; she hadn't realized how needy some of the children could be. Was she ever like that?

The telephone rang, and Lily let it ring a couple of times before picking it up.

"Hello?"

"Sure – Hey, it's James," the other side greeted. The redhead had to resist shivering from hearing James' voice. That cut-off, saying 'Sure' to whoever, sounded like normal James. When he said hello to her, his voice almost subtly dropped sinfully low.

_That's not the voice I will be allowed to hear often_, she reminded herself.

"Hi…I see you've managed to work the telephone," she said, surprised. She really wasn't, even though he had never figured out how to use it during their marriage; he got her to call, or just sent messages through owls, or popped his head in people's fires.

"Remus taught me."

An awkward silence nearly settled in when Lily hastily broke in. "So, what's this about?"

"Oh, when we were talking the other day you made me realize I have to revoke the 'can't be near son' section on the divorcing papers." James nearly choked on the word divorce but caught himself quickly enough so that Lily didn't notice.

"So you're saying we have to go to court to take that away?"

"Yeah. We're scheduled in around ten days; I thought I'd just like you to know."

"Thanks, I'll – I'll talk to you again another time; I have to go do something for my sister – oh! And you still have to tell me what you told our s – Harry about me," she blurted. It wasn't said out loud, but they both knew she was lying, trying to get away from the call, from what they were talking about, from _him_. _Was she afraid of him?_

"Okay, bye," he quietly said, before waiting to hear the hang up on the other side, before slowly putting his phone back on the receiver. He should've kept her on longer. That way, he could listen to her talk so long that he could memorize it perfectly.

Maybe she didn't want anything to do with him, he reasoned. He couldn't argue with her; he _had_ slept with another woman in _their bed_. Apart from her stuttering, it didn't seem like she was affected by him at all. Had she already moved on?

It sounded logical enough. It _had_ been a couple of years since they'd uttered an 'I love you' to each other. But why couldn't he move on as easily as she had? He had never been one to dwell too long on his feelings; he claimed he got too bored. Lily had always been the one to overanalyze and over exaggerate.

_Why couldn't he move on when _she_ could_?

-&-

A/N: Sorry for the late update. I've been swimming a lot this whole week and I've been too lazy to really sit down to write a lot. I've also begun to get some stress from schoolwork (I've been procrastinating by playing internet games the whole time) and stress from friends. Dx

Anywho, sorry for the late update, _again_. I can't apologize enough because the next chapter will probably be late or late_r_ as well. If I apologize a lot for this chapter, I'll exhaust myself apologizing for the next.


	5. Chapter 5

Title: Rekindle

**Title: **Rekindle

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, sadly.  
**Genre:** Romance/General  
**Rating:** T  
**Summary: **Three years ago, Lily lost her son, home, money, husband, and dignity. She's still in the process of rebuilding her life, when she becomes a kindergarten teacher for young magical children. It doesn't help at all that her 2nd marriage fails and she ends up teaching her son, Harry Potter.

-&-

_Do you know where your heart is?  
Do you think you can find it?  
Or did you trade it for something  
Somewhere better just to have it?  
Do you know where your love is?  
Do you think that you lost it?  
You felt it so strong, but  
Nothing's turned out how you wanted_

"Say All I Need" – OneRepublic

_This morning I rolled out of bed  
Recalling all the sweet things you said  
This was the day I was gonna hurt you bad  
Called out your name, but you didn't answer back  
I searched the house to find out what was wrong  
Like a ton of bricks, it hit me you were gone_

_All along I knew that there was something missing  
And only one thing left to do  
I had to leave behind this life that we'd been living  
But the only thing that left was you_

"My Worst Fear" – Rascal Flatts

_I don't know why I'm not falling apart  
Like I usually do  
And how the thought of losing you's not killing me  
I feel bad  
That I can stand here strong  
Cold as stone, Seems so wrong  
I can't explain it  
Maybe it's just  
I've cried so much  
I'm tired and I'm numb_

_Baby I hate it  
I feel bad that I don't feel bad_

_That I don't feel bitter, alone  
I just feel its time, its time to move on  
I just gotta move on and on and on and on_

"I Feel Bad" – Rascal Flatts

-&-

_Betrayed._

That had been how Lily felt immediately when she found out James had gotten drunk and slept with another woman, _in their bed._ The bed where he'd told her he loved her, where they'd made love countless times, where he woke up earlier to watch her awake – and he, in his drunken state, had had sex with another woman.

Lily didn't think he could ever possibly know the humiliation of watching her party guests smile sympathetically, hearing the noise and immediately knowing what it was.

She knew he wouldn't do it if he was sober, so she tried, tried, to erase that from her mind. Everyday, however, she was plagued with going into their bedroom with Sirius and Remus to find two naked people in the bed.

She had right away wanted to run away from him. Would she have? Should she have?

_Could she have?_

She always had known she was a weak person – all throughout her childhood and Hogwarts years, she had depended on various people for support.

So how was she able to decide, on her own, to send him the divorce papers? Had she really changed through that?

That would still not have explained how all these old feelings were coming back to her. She hadn't mulled over James since they had officially broken off their marriage. Sure, she had cried, but then she began forgetting him. Forgetting what he looked like, what he was to her, why she loved him.

According to Remus, James never got past the fact that they separated. A wizarding marriage, Remus had explained to her after James' proposal, is almost a magical and spiritual binding of the two people's souls. To separate, as in divorce, was mentally draining because both people's souls indirectly depended on each other. That was why wizard divorces rarely happened – most divorced people died of a broken heart because they couldn't live without each other.

Sometimes, the werewolf explained, the pieces don't fit very well together; the magic that is mentioned on the wedding papers fixes it so both sides will fit each other more – it depended on the people's personalities to see how much the magic would round out the edges. After living the significant other for a while, the pieces would eventually meld together because that meant their love had been weathered by enough events to show they were compatible.

Magic as in spells and charms, Lily had asked. Remus had chuckled. It was a very ancient magic, he told her, which came and went. The magic couldn't be caught in a person's mouth to vocalize – it was too complicated to actually control it. Some people liked to leave it nameless; some called it matchmaking; Remus had told the redhead he preferred the word love.

-&-

"Are you willing to cash out the rain check?" asked Lily nervously, almost shyly, to James in her classroom. All the students and their parents had left except for the three of them – they were starting to establish a regular routine. In the morning James would drop off Harry and they would exchange a quick pleasantry, Lily would smile and usher Harry into the classroom – after school James would always come last because of whatever was holding him up at the Ministry, and they'd talk for a few minutes. Amicable, friendly talk. They didn't go near the border of talking personal story; it was like they could sense that they weren't ready to delve in what happened after their divorce because of who they used to be to each other.

James had taken Lily out with Harry after the court altered the not being able to see child section of their divorcing papers. He considered it a sort of celebration and took them to a relatively fancy restaurant; it had been the one where Lily had met his parents. James had not gathered the courage to go to the restaurant in where he proposed to her; it was pretty obvious she would have recognized the place and taken it as a slap to the face.

Lily had dressed up. She remembered that restaurant and opted to wear a dress she had worn during the earliest weeks of pregnancy. She looked beautiful, in James' opinion. It had taken him a lot of control to object to a waiter calling the trio a lovely family.

"You mean today?" James answered, absentmindedly ruffling Harry's hair. "If you're not busy then we could; I'll just ask Remus to look after Harry. What did you want to talk about?"

"Just miscellaneous things," she said. In reality, she wanted to ask about what he told Harry about her. She wanted to know how he managed to let her go – but she couldn't do that because they weren't the them anymore.

_I want to heal your heart's wounds._

"Okay, I'll meet you at the coffee shop two streets from here after I get Remus to sit for Harry. It'll only take a few minutes."

-&-

"So what did you want to talk about?" James asked curiously. He cursed himself for suggesting to go to the coffee place, because of the dim lighting in there. It made the atmosphere seem more intimate between them. Their table was relatively small and the music was softly playing in the background. James could feel their legs barely touching under the table, as they sipped their coffee – they were sitting in an intimate position, where they both sat next to each other. The dark vibe coming from the lack of light made their hands seem closer than they actually were.

"What did you tell Harry about me? And when?" she asked, brisk to hide the huskiness in her voice.

He didn't answer right away. "I didn't hold back about telling him about you, when he asked. Before he did, he thought that a dad with no wife was normal, until he saw the children at the playground. I didn't lie either; I told the honest truth about you – you were the beautiful, intelligent, witty woman I married before the –"

He cleared his throat. " – separation."

"Of course," he continued, a little softer, "he wanted to see pictures so I showed him the ones from our wedding."

She didn't respond immediately, either. But when she did –

"Why'd you inform Harry of that?"

"Why wouldn't I? You looked lovely in the pictures –"

"That's not what I meant," she said, almost cold and defensive. "Why tell him that I was all those things when I wasn't?"

"It was the truth." Then he changed the topic and she was grateful. Grateful he wasn't taking advantage the intimate aura or the romantic setting they were in. However, this topic wasn't so pretty either.

"Lily … did you ever think about us after …?"

She turned, so she couldn't see his face – it was easier that way. "Why would I? We were over, then too. Did you?"

"This isn't about me, Lily. Did you ever –"

"Look, James," she snapped fiercely, surprised at her own reaction. "I really _loved _you. I wanted to give you everything and I did. Sometimes I wanted you all the way until it hurt in my heart, really badly. I _needed_ you. When you slept with that woman, I was devastated. You blew my heart to smithereens, and I wondered if I'd get back on my feet, ever again. Sometimes I wonder if I did ever get back up, if this is helping me. Putting you away from sight and mind really allowed me to finally see there are things more important than crying over you. We aren't together, nor do I want us to be. What happened_ happened_. Okay, so now that we're clear on how I feel, can we change the subject?"

"Can I ask something related to Harry, then?"

"What is it – tell me and I'll decide whether I want to answer."

"Why is it you never fought for custody of Harry, or at least to see him?"

"He was yours. I don't take what's not mine."

_Like my heart. _"You gave birth to him," he said.

"Look, did you even listen to what your lawyer was planning to do? He was going to make sure I could only see my child for an hour, every week – an hour that I was _sure_ to be working, so I'd be busy, _to not see my own child_. And even if I ditched work for Harry, there would always be some social worker asking why I was hugging him or kissing him or telling him I loved him. Then, your lawyer would take those precious hours away from me, warning the courts that I might be a pedophile out to get him. It was going to be a lose-lose for me anyway," Lily said bitterly.

-&-

"I worry about you, you know," Sirius carelessly said to James one day, in the privacy of James' office.

"You sure don't look like it," he retorted.

"You haven't been this off since when Lily first left you," Sirius replied, thoughtfully. "Are you sure you're okay? You insist it every time, except I see you falling back down."

James sighed, looking at his paperwork. "I'm not. I can't think anymore – how did you even notice this when you don't see anything? Remus tell you?"

"No," Sirius answered, looking rather offended. "We were at the bar yesterday, remember? Usually you down a half glass of firewhiskey and that's it, because you're trying to get out of that obsession of yours. However, you downed three firewhiskeys without blinking last night."

"Before that I was at a coffee shop with Lily, since she wanted to talk…"

"What'd you two talk about?"

"Harry, in some sort of involved way, I guess. I asked all the wrong questions and she poured her heart out to me, telling me how she felt and – I don't think I ever fully knew what she was going through."

"James, what did you ask her?" Sirius stared at him.

"It was stupid of me, I know – I asked if she ever thought of us getting back together –"

"That was dumb," Sirius interrupted, looking at him disgustedly. "Of all the things you could have said, _you do not, under any circumstances, ask a woman if she's willing to be with you again after you cheated on her_!"

"Sirius?"

He didn't seem to hear his name. "That's practically the first rule of the book, idiot! Why you'd even _think_ to ask her that is beyond my understanding!"

"Sirius?"

"And that was _Lily _– you do not ask _Lily_ if she's going to marry you again, _especially when you guys aren't even dating_!"

"She kissed me," James interrupted. "The day before I found out she divorced Diggory, I saw her on the streets so I drove her home. When she left the car, she kissed me. On the lips. Like we were married again. So I got hope and worked up what I had to ask her that. I still want her."

"But she doesn't want you," his best friend said quietly, finally ending his tirade.

"No, she doesn't," James said softly. "She doesn't want me."

-&-

A/N: So, so, so, so sorry I never updated quickly enough. I wrote this chapter all today, after I realized I had never began the fifth chapter.

Three sets of lyrics up there? :O Yes! Why?

I feel that the first one shows what Lily and James did in their marriage; the second shows what James felt when Lily first left their house; the last shows Lily feeling nothing when she left, that she was numb until her feelings caught up with her later on.

Not only that, I'm sort of in a Rascal Flatts obsession right now, since I love, _love_ their songs.


	6. Chapter 6

Title: Rekindle

**Title: **Rekindle

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, sadly.  
**Genre:** Romance/General  
**Rating:** T  
**Summary: **Three years ago, Lily lost her son, home, money, husband, and dignity. She's still in the process of rebuilding her life, when she becomes a kindergarten teacher for young magical children. It doesn't help at all that her 2nd marriage fails and she ends up teaching her son, Harry Potter.

-&-

_Help me remember  
The way that we used to be  
When nothin' else mattered  
"cause you were lovin' me  
Just for the night, one last time  
One more good memory  
When I look back  
That's what I wanna see_

"Help Me Remember" – Rascal Flatts

-&-

"So what am I going to do?" James asked tiredly, running a hand through his hair.

"Do what you do best – get drunk and bitch at your best friend," Sirius drawled lazily. "Not that it's done anything to better your life, ever, even though I must admit my presence sure helps."

"I know something does better my life, but I'm this positive it isn't you," he retorted.

"You sure?" Sirius countered back effortlessly, like it was a normal routine.

"I think the person goes by 'Harry Potter', not 'Sirius Black'; personally I don't know who would find the name 'Sirius Black' appealing."

"I'm leaving," Sirius said curtly. "I need to go to St. Mungo's because of an injured ego, where an attractive _female Healer will nurse it back to health_."

"Padfoot," James warned.

"Sorry," he waved offhandedly at him. "By the way, the day you said you picked up Lily … do you know _why_ she was on the streets?"

"No," the other man answered. He frowned at Sirius' casual tone. "Should I?"

"She was leaving court," Sirius replied. "Divorce court – even though you heard about it the next day – Remus told me you picked her up _right after_ the trial."

"Oh."

"Doesn't that interest you?" he continued in that same indifferent voice.

"Should it? I'm not sure what you're playing at."

"Remember you mentioned all those marks on her body?"

"Yeah, do they mean something – look, if it's some kind of sexual accomplishment Diggory achieved on her, I don't want to know about it."

Sirius looked at him strangely. "Why would I say any good thing about him, especially in bed? Everybody knows I'm the god."

James didn't answer, waiting for him to continue.

"Diggory was abusing her. Physically, mind you; he wouldn't have only been divorced if it had been rape –"

"He _hit_ her?"

Sirius swallowed slowly. "Yeah. Remember how happy you were when Diggory got kicked off the Chudley Cannons? That was why; he was abusing his wife."

"_Merlin_ – why didn't anybody help or, at least, _notice _that?"

"She said she was fine, that he was just drunk and didn't know what he was doing. We didn't believe it, of course, but you know Lily's stubborn. She doesn't listen to anybody."

"Why didn't _I_ ever know about this?"

"She felt it unnecessary to tell you, I guess. She didn't want you to know, considering, you know, your current status."

"Why didn't she listen to anybody, though? Surely you guys didn't stop," James said incredulously.

"Of course not – Remus even thought of a person she would listen to, but before we could get to that person, she was already divorcing him. Looks like she took our advice."

"Who was the person?"

"You really don't need to know, Prongs," Sirius finished. "It's all history now, anyway."

"Tell me."

"You have to promise you won't tell anybody I told you this."

"Okay. Now tell me, please."

"It was you," Sirius replied softly. "Moony knew you would be the only person she would listen to, regardless of what happened between you two. He remembered in seventh year, when you both were friends, that she would hear anybody's opinion but only act on yours."

"Oh." There was a silence as James struggled to keep his thoughts from being spoken. Was he flattered by this? He couldn't believe Lily, _his_ Lily, had been abused in marriage. He hadn't helped nor heard of it either! What had he been doing when Diggory punched her? Getting witlessly drunk, wallowing at how miserable his life was!

"Don't feel bad, Prongs. Nobody told you and you didn't know until now. It's not a big deal – all the hits she took were minor, anyway. They could have been healed with a simple healing spell," Sirius said, putting his hand on James' back.

"I'm not thinking about her physical health," James snapped, so harshly Sirius took his hand back in surprise. "Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I mean, physical abuse might be dealing with her body, but it affects the mind too. Does she have nightmares or anything?"

"That's the other thing," Sirius said quietly. "The Healer in charge of her after the divorce finalized asked if she wanted her mind wiped, or the memory put in a Pensieve. She said no. She asked for a relatively archaic spell that blended that memory along with other ones. This way, it's still in her mind, but there's this barrier that won't let her access that part of her life unless she really wants or needs to. I think it's pretty weird too, that she asked for another part of her to be like that…"

"What part?" James leapt. If it had been him, he would have wanted to erase it immediately.

"I shouldn't have said that."

"You did, anyway," James pointed out.

"She wanted it to be done with your marriage, as well," he admitted. "She was about to, but Remus convinced her to not do it. The Healer was confused too. You guys were all up in the papers everywhere, even in the Muggle ones since her father's part of the Muggle politics. Why would any woman, _hell_, any person want to forget some of the best times of their life?"

-&-

_Evans, the Black Widow, Attempts to Strike Again_

_Obviously third time's the try, yes? At least it is with Lily Evans, both the ex-wife of James Potter, the famous ex-Auror and trusted right hand man of the Minister, and Amos Diggory, former Chaser of the Chudley Cannons. First time she married James Potter, it obviously did not work out – Evans left her place in their divorce law firm (a bit ironic, don't you think?) after two years of marriage. Potter replaced her with one of his Hogwarts classmates – Remus Lupin – but the firm collapsed, tried his hand at being an Auror but left because of his son Harry Potter, and now works at the Ministry. After that divorce, Evans went straight into the arms of famous Chaser Amos Diggory. From Evans' former peers, they say Diggory and Evans had dated a bit during their time at Hogwarts. They had their perfect marriage of three years, until very recently Evans divorced him. Even though it is not entirely confirmed, it is rumored Diggory was abusing his wife and she left him because of it. Tthe timing is very coincidental; it appears Diggory's removal from his team and the divorce are connected._

_After that divorce, it appears __Lily Evans__ is now a teacher – and teaching her own son! We have seen Harry Potter's parents in restaurants, sitting pretty cozily and sipping drinks. Could it be that they might be considering remarriage? If so, what is Evans' motive? She's obviously trying to get something out of marriage, a lifelong commitment. Could it be money? Her two ex-husbands had had money, after all. Can we really call her a black widow, the spider? After both divorces, the only person who seemed to have been hurt through it was Evans herself. A black widow harms her husband – maybe Evans lacks the skill to do so? She's only succeeded in hurting herself…she's the tree with no bite _or _bark – _

"This article is bullshit."

Lily Evans cocked an eyebrow, looking at James' stony face as James threw the newspaper on the floor and ignited it. The two adults both watched the paper burst into fire, before James found a telephone booth in the current café they were sitting in.

"Hello? Oh, hey Moony. Would it – would it bother you if I asked you to take care of Harry a little longer than I expected? Something came up," James growled.

"Sure, James. Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm having some coffee with Lily right now; we were reading the _Daily Prophet_. If you want to know what I'm talking about, go read the front-page article. I burned mine."

"Okay," Remus said cautiously. "I'll talk to you later; I have to get Harry to finish his homework."

"Bye," James replied. He walked back to where Lily had sat, patiently waiting. "I _can't believe what they write nowadays._"

"Why not?"

James looked at her, surprised. "How can I? You – you wouldn't marry for money, would you?" _You didn't marry _me_ for money, did you? You didn't _use_ me, did you?_

_You married me because you loved me, right?_

"I wouldn't use someone for money," Lily agreed. "Or anything else."

They sat in a comfortable silence before Lily shrugged, looking at her choice of wear. "It probably doesn't help the rumors with me dressed like this," she sighed.

James glanced at her, disguising his appreciative look. She was wearing one of his old, large shirts – one she had taken from him since they had started dating in the seventh year. James remembered how it was. Lily would overwork herself, James would pick her up and carry her into his bedroom – by then she would have awoken sleepily and they would have to change into appropriate sleepwear. James would toss her a faded white T-shirt and turn his back when she stripped off her clothing; James would just take off his shirt and change into his pajama bottoms, bare-chested. Lily's bare legs would tangle with his on the mattress, and they'd wake up in very much the same position.

Of course, it took many weeks for Lily to actually grow accustomed to it – it never failed to raise a blush from her each time, however. Additionally, sometimes their pelvises would rub against each other and James would wake up aroused; Lily would blush and apologize sleepily when they woke up and James would smile, telling her not to – before leaving for a cold shower. By then, Lily would have fallen back asleep.

"It probably doesn't help that we're not fighting in public," James said, letting out a laugh.

Lily smiled ruefully. "Or that my hair's down the way it used to be around you and we're sitting at a couple's table."

James chuckled. It was amazing they were talking like this after three years of no contact – talking like they were old acquaintances that met to make meaningless conversation. He hoped they would move past that soon – he still liked her.

Maybe he did still love her, not like. Maybe they'd move past the insignificant little things they talked about to bigger things.

But for now, baby steps.

Maybe one large step – maybe a push.

Maybe it would lead to one step forward, two steps back.

He sipped his own coffee from his mug and paused.

"If you don't mind me asking, why did you marry Diggory?"

She didn't respond for a good minute. Her posture hadn't tightened, nor had it loosened. She just … didn't react.

"You don't have to answer," he said slowly.

Lily sifted her fingers through her hair, making James marvel at its softness.

"I – I didn't really have a choice, I suppose. He tried to contact me during our marriage, to 'reconnect' as he said. I didn't let him. Then after the divorce, he asked me to be his date for a formal gathering – there were swimming rumors of our speedy engagement, but I think he arranged for it. For right after, he denied all of them, and declared them false – next day he had already proposed."

Her voice was soft and quiet, firm and thoughtful. Her pensive expression matched her voice as she sipped her coffee sporadically throughout her story.

"I never wanted to say yes, but he proposed in a fancy restaurant and I didn't want to embarrass him; though Rita Skeeter still found a way to scandalize me."

"Called you a scarlet woman," James murmured, his eyes transfixed on what was in his cup. It was either that or he was going to kiss her.

"Yes," she nodded. It seemed like the fight had gone out of her against him during the divorce, when they had read that article earlier, and now Skeeter's attempt at ruining her reputation – where had her spirit gone? "Diggory held her in court for it; she had a suspension from the newspaper for a year or so – she went to court the day before we married, actually. It was all fine the first year of marriage – he said he didn't want children because it would lower his Quidditch playing appeal; I replied I wouldn't have it any other way."

James tried hard to suppress a laugh but failed. "You actually said that?"

"He thought it was a joke," the redhead shrugged. "But I was serious. I never slept with him; I never slept in the same bed with him – hell, right after the wedding he went to the pub to celebrate a game victory!"

"Yet you continued with him."

"Yes," she agreed. "It wasn't until one night he had too much to drink and hit me by accident. He apologized the next day of course, and said it was just a fumble and he had miscalculated the distance for his arm to move during his drunken stupor – but as one knows, it often escalates into something worse."

"Then what?"

"He hit me," she said quietly. "He came home drunk and just hit me, like I was a plastic mannequin. Sometimes he wasn't that drunk, so I was spared. But there were times he punched me in the stomach, and it would hurt because he wouldn't stop and each hit was worse. I went to St. Mungo's frequently because of internal bleeding and they dared not question who did this to me. Eventually I came to my senses and left him."

-&-

_"Who's that in the picture with you, Dad?"_

"_Huh?" James looked up from his spot in the attic. "Which picture?"_

"_This one," Harry replied, pointing a finger at the redhead next to a laughing James. She was smiling and James' face was aimed toward the camera. The redhead's smile was soft and loving, but her face was looking at James' adoringly because he was why she was smiling._

"_Oh, that's your mother there. We were – uh – seventeen, I think." In truth, James didn't really need to think. He knew _exactly_ when that picture had been. They were visiting a park near Lily's house, having a picnic while Lily was showing him a Muggle camera. _

"_She's really pretty," the boy said, letting his fingers gently trail her hair. "But why isn't she facing the camera, Dad? Why's she looking at you? Didn't she know you guys were taking a picture?"_

"_I suppose she did that on purpose," James said, choosing his words carefully. "I didn't even notice until you pointed it out; you're very observant, Harry."_

"_I think she's really beautiful."_

"_She is, Harry."_

"_Then why don't I see her?"_

"_Harry," James sighed. He considered making up a lie, or walking away in a huff but he would never avoid or lie to a question from his child. After all, Harry was _his_ child. "We love you very much. We used to love each other very much too, but we just don't anymore."_

"_Why not?" James watched more, but Harry didn't show any sign of tears or tantrum. _

_James shrugged, ruffling his son's hair affectionately as he tried to find something to say. But Harry did ask a good question. Why didn't they love each other anymore? – it was quite obvious she didn't love him because he had slept with another woman; that had pained him very much too – but why didn't he love her anymore? _Did_ he not love her anymore? "We just … stopped, I guess."_

_Harry didn't answer for a bit, so James got a little worried. He observed Harry was looking at the picture very carefully and as much as it pained him, James said, "You can keep the picture if you want."_

"_Thank you, Daddy," the four year old said happily, carefully hugging the picture to his chest. He seemed to understand the sentimental value behind the photo, which made James believe he was older than he actually was. Then it all went back to the Harry James was familiar with – the hyper, excited, and happy one he knew; not the brooding, pensive, silent one he had just seen._

"_She's really pretty," Harry said happily._

-&-

A/N: Sorry for the delay! I just finished the chapter _today_, a few hours after my GRADUATION! :D I graduated today, and decided to write to burn off some energy. :)

And it's graduation from junior high school, not high school. I'm not that old. :P


	7. Chapter 7

**Title: **Rekindle**  
Disclaimer:** Not mine, sadly.  
**Genre:** Romance/General  
**Rating:** T  
**Summary: **Three years ago, Lily lost her son, home, money, husband, and dignity. She's still in the process of rebuilding her life, when she becomes a kindergarten teacher for young magical children. It doesn't help at all that her second marriage fails and she ends up teaching her son, Harry Potter.

-&-

_I tried my best at moving on  
Have yet to find a girl like you  
I see things that I didn't before  
And I'm wishing I had more time with you  
How do you (sleep)  
Knowing all I can do is think of you  
All the things we thought about  
That never will happen again if I could just see you_

"How Do You Sleep" – Jesse McCartney

-&-

"Where's my dad?" Harry Potter asked, sitting at his desk. Lily mused at how less forlorn her son looked _now_, compared to the first week James had been late. "He's usually here by now, isn't he?"

"Yes," she agreed, "but remember the court thing? I get custody of you for a few hours on Tuesdays and Thursdays."

"Today's Tuesday," he said slowly.

"Yes," she said, vaguely amused at how Harry said that. It reminded her of James.

"Okay," Harry said agreeably. "What are we going to do?"

"What do you _want_ to do?" Lily asked, smiling. "I was thinking about me taking you back to my flat, spending some time together, and then eating dinner. Your father will pick you up afterwards."

"Okay!"

-&-

Lily had driven her and Harry back to her flat, which wasn't very far away from where her parents lived. He was enthralled by how she lived in a neighborhood of Muggles and that she didn't need to use magic _all_ the time.

Then she showed him around her place, with him being reserved and quiet, until he saw the Muggle electronics. She showed him the television she had – he was entranced by it – and then he surprised her by demonstrating how to use the telephone.

"Uncle Remus made me remember how, in case my dad forgot how," he offered as an explanation. Lily resisted stiffening at the mention of James, before she led him into the kitchen.

"Here, kiddo, time to do your homework," she announced.

"Are you sure? I think it's 'Harry and Mummy Time'," Harry said cutely. Lily couldn't stop herself from glowing when he had acknowledged she was his mother.

"Sorry, your dad's coming to pick you up a little before your bedtime, and you have homework to do," Lily said regretfully. "But how about I make you anything you want for dinner?"

"Anything?" Harry's eyes bulged. "Like as in you cook it yourself?"

"Yeah, how else?" Lily wondered. How _did_ James feed their son?

"My dad just transfigures up some food. I mean, it looks good, but it tastes like paper. Then he calls Uncle Remus or Uncle Sirius and tricks them into cooking for me and him, too."

"Sirius can cook?" Lily asked, amused. The Sirius Black she knew from Hogwarts had been a passionate, charismatic Casanova – and a lazy bum. The only times she ever witnessed his brilliance was when he was one, planning pranks, or two, defending his Marauders.

"Learned, from Uncle Remus," came the reply. "It's great they can cook good–"

"– well, honey," she corrected.

"– well, but I'd rather not have to bother them; Uncle Sirius came once absolutely furious. His hair was all smudged and there was some red paint or something on his face, and then he yelled at my dad. I asked him what the red was, but then he said he'd tell me when I was older."

Stifling a laugh, Lily marveled at how seriously Sirius was taking his responsibility as Harry's godfather – especially during when he was … _involved_. She remembered Sirius had been extremely pissed off when James had appointed him godfather, saying he wouldn't be a good role model and why not Remus. James had countered back with a, 'Think about it this way, if you screw it up, we know to never let you see him again.'

-&-

"Harry, what would you like to eat?"

"Anything you would like," Harry said politely, after packing up his homework and clearing the table. "I'll go set the table!"

"Silverware in the first cupboard, cutlery in the second," she called, looking through her refrigerator and cookbook. "How do you feel about spaghetti and meatballs with some bread, salad, and soup on the side?"

"May I watch?" Harry asked eagerly.

"Want to be my special helper today?" Lily smiled. She took out two aprons and shrunk one of them, before giving it to Harry.

Harry was to help her read the cookbook page, hand her the ingredients to be measured, and stir the soup. It got occasionally messy, but Lily didn't say a word. She just cleaned it, and continued allowing him to help. She instructed him on how to toss the salad, before he could do it as literally as James had done in the past, before allowing him to carry the salad and the bread the table. Following him came Lily and levitating bowls of soup and plates of pasta.

"Yum," Harry said appreciatively. "I can't wait to tell Draco Malfoy he was wrong!"

"Wrong about what?" This certainly piqued her interest. In her classroom, she always made sure to lower the disharmony and squabbles between her students, but of course, she couldn't be everywhere all the time.

"Um," Harry crinkled his forehead. "He said that you left because you didn't want me or the 'mum and dad life' anymore. I didn't listen, 'cos you always say mean things aren't true, and looks like I'm right and he's wrong. Problem solved!"

Quietly, Lily took his small hand into her own smooth ones. "Harry, never believe that. I didn't leave because I didn't want you. Your daddy and I love you very much. Understand?"

"Yes, I understand," he said dutifully. They ate dinner moving onto lighter topics as Lily mulled over it in her mind. She knew that Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy were not a happy couple – Draco was proof of that. She had heard through the grapevine –mostly made up of her students' mothers– that the Malfoys had a big fight and Narcissa had left their family home. Would Lucius really have told his son his mother hadn't wanted him? –If so, why? Was it to make him feel a little better?

Still, that was no excuse for talking to his son like that.

-&-

Harry was watching the television when James arrived at her flat at eight-fifteen. She greeted him in the hallway, hoping to talk so they'd have some privacy.

"Nice place. How was he?" James asked, hoping to get to talk to Lily before leaving for the night.

Lily smiled. "He was awfully perfect – very polite and quiet; he even helped me make dinner."

"Which was?"

She grinned widely. "Spaghetti and meatballs accompanied with salad, bread, and soup – followed by a dessert of fruit."

"Cool," he found himself saying. Then James mentally kicked himself. Now he sounded as stupid as he had been when he was fifteen.

"He did, however, say something interesting at dinner," she said casually.

"Which was?"

She finally looked up at him, her whole face moving to see his – her being so short ("No, you're just too tall!"). "He thought I, as his mother, left because I didn't want him."

Her voice wasn't accusing, nor was it entirely neutral. Her tone was too casual and cool for his liking. "I never said that."

"I know, and I'm not accusing you," she said softly. It was obvious both of them didn't hear Thomas the Engine's voice in the room less than five feet away. "It was Draco Malfoy."

"Lucius," James said, understanding. Apparently he heard it through the gossip as well. Regretfully, James said, after looking at his watch, "We better go; he has to go to school tomorrow."

"Yeah," and for once, Lily realized this was their closest encounter since she had kissed him unintentionally.

-&-

"Give me my doll back! It's mine!" out came a screech from a little redheaded girl. The taller blond Malfoy sniggered in reply, with his two companions crossing their arms as Draco Malfoy held the doll up to taunt her.

"No."

Lily had been keeping up tabs on the playground as all the different kindergarten classes got together during recess, when she heard the little voice. She knew immediately it belonged to Ginny Weasley, the youngest and only daughter of the Weasley family. She watched as her brother Ron walked up to Draco Malfoy and said something, which just made the pale blonde boy laugh.

Ginny was easily the youngest child of her class – to repay Molly Weasley's friendship, Lily had offered to look after Ginny during school hours by enrolling Ginny in for free. The Weasley parents were very busy; Arthur was part of the Ministry and Molly was recently accepted into it as well so she didn't have time to look after Ginny. It was arranged that Molly's eldest son Bill would pick up the youngest Weasleys after school ended.

Sighing, Lily walked over to them and sternly said, "Draco, give back Ginny's doll. You know it's not nice to take other people's things."

Sulking, Draco stalked off as Ron led his sister to where he was playing with Harry and Hermione.

-&-

"Mr. Malfoy, before you leave with your son, may I speak to you?" Lily asked. Determinedly, she hid her nervousness as Lucius signaled for his son to wait outside the classroom. She was going to have to ignore that she was talking to one of her peers when he had thought she was beneath him. Here, she was just a tired woman attacked by the press, and he was a man whose son attacked her students.

"Yes?"

"Your son has been bothering a few of my students."

Lucius shrugged emotionlessly. His skin was pale and seemed flawless, but Lily had the feeling that there was a glamour charm on his face. If the charm were to cast off, she would probably see dark circles under his eyes.

"Draco took a girl's doll, and before that, he told," Lily continued, watching his expression, "another boy that his mother left because she didn't love him anymore."

When Lucius didn't respond, Lily pressed on softly. "I heard, Lucius, Narcissa left the manor?"

"Yes," Lucius replied quietly. "She did."

Knowing Lucius thought that he seemed desperate because he was talking to a Muggleborn used to berate and/or take points off his house in his year, Lily continued to speak. "Why did she leave?"

Lucius lowered his eyes, before evasively saying, "Family custom."

Lily paused, thinking. What could get Narcissa Malfoy to leave her family for a family custom? She knew pureblood families were into customs and being old-fashioned but what could have –

"You and her were an arranged marriage," Lily said, slowly understanding. "Then came time after Draco was old enough and your parents made you choose a mistress, because pureblood wives are only for bearing children. Narcissa thought you two had found love, or something close to it, but then you didn't refuse to choose a mistress. She left because she thought you used her to have a child and that the relationship you two had built was nothing. Was I anywhere close?"

"I was summoned to my parents' and they said it was time to choose a mistress. Draco was old enough to be without his mother for a few periods of time. Narcissa was there too, and she saw I didn't say no. She was upset and we fought. Then she left."

"Did you choose a mistress in the end?"

Lucius shook his head dismally. "After she left I told my parents I didn't want nor need a mistress. They were a little angry because I'd said no, but they couldn't do anything. I have the only heir at the moment."

"You let Draco believe Narcissa didn't want him, didn't you?"

He nodded again. "I didn't answer where she was, so he just – just came to that conclusion, I guess."

Quietly this time, Lily said, "You had no right in letting your son believe his mother didn't want him, especially when it isn't true. He told this to another boy, but fortunately, he didn't believe it. I recommend you find Narcissa and talk things out. If it does not work out, contact Molly Weasley – she can help."

Catching Lucius' doubtful face, she added, "Now isn't the time to think about old family feuds. If you care enough to bring your wife back to you, you're going to need to suck up your pride and go to Mrs. Weasley. Knowing her, she wouldn't mention anything between your two families and treat you with respect as if you were any other person. If you are going to see her, I hope you treat her that way too."

Lucius nodded, before collecting himself and walking through the door.

"Thank you for your time, Mr. Malfoy," Lily added softly.

Then, she let out a sigh she had been holding in since he walked into the room.

-&-

A/N: SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATE! I could lie and say I was on vacation, but I wasn't. Dx

I kind of lost some interest and engrossed myself into downloading songs onto my new iPod. xD

I was beginning/writing some new ideas that aren't going to be on FictionPress for some time. :(

But I'd love if you checked out some of my poetry that _is_ on FictionPress right now! My Fictionpress link is on my fanfiction page. :D

Review please! May I have at least ten reviews this time? (My average for the past chapters was eight per chapter, except the most recent one's quota fell short. I want to keep my average at the very least, the same. So pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease?)


	8. Chapter 8

**Title: **Rekindle**  
Disclaimer:** Not mine, sadly.  
**Genre:** Romance/General  
**Rating:** T  
**Summary: **Three years ago, Lily lost her son, home, money, husband, and dignity. She's still in the process of rebuilding her life, when she becomes a kindergarten teacher for young magical children. It doesn't help at all that her second marriage fails and she ends up teaching her son, Harry Potter.

-&-

_It's only love, it's only pain  
It's only fear that runs through my veins  
It's all the things you can't explain  
That make us human  
__Where do I begin, can I shed this skin?  
What is this I feel within?_  
"Human" – Civil Twilight

_A smile relieves a heart that grieves  
Remember what I said  
I'm not waiting on a lady  
I'm just waiting on a friend  
_"Waiting on a Friend" – Rolling Stones

-&-

"Lily," James said hoarsely, "remember Peter Pettigrew?"

She nodded. He had been the fourth member of the Marauders at Hogwarts, until one night in seventh year; Lily had stumbled him applying salve onto his arm, where she saw a what was called Dark Mark or something like that – the press had warned Aurors captured other people with this same image upon their arm. Alerting James first and then asking him if they should report to the professors, James hadn't responded. There had been attention from press warning that Dark times were coming, and to be careful who to trust – James had been numb. Finally, he told Sirius and Remus.

It had been a day of firsts. It was the first day of her being his girlfriend; it was the first time James ever included her in with the Marauders like they were always a group; it was the first time she had ever seen Sirius' forehead crinkle with worry. School was almost ending, James had concluded with a sigh. They weren't going to alert Dumbledore, and just carry out with their celebration plan.

Because of Lily's warning to them all, the Marauders were careful about what they said to Peter, especially since they were starting out as Aurors. They saw less and less of Peter until one day a few months after they married James was assigned to take down a suspected criminal's home. And whose home had it been, but Peter's? The raid ended successfully, even with the one behind it all captured. Quickly afterwards, though, James resigned and became one for the Ministry.

"Sorry, Peter," James had said, before he disarmed him and Peter was then whisked off to Azkaban.

"He's dead," James croaked. "Peter. Dead."

Lily poured him a cup of tea, before settling herself on the couch close enough for their legs to feel like they were touching. "Where's Harry?"

"Parents. Needed alone time."

"How do you feel?" she asked gently.

His face made her heart clench most painfully. "Like I was the one who killed him."

"You were only doing your job. How did he die?" Lily said, trying to soothe him.

"There were two Azkaban guards leading in a new prisoner, and Peter was out of his cell to relocate. The guards left them alone for one minute, and the new prisoner just saw some broken pipes or something nearby. You can guess what happened next."

"I can't help but think this is all my fault," Lily murmured. "I was the one who told you, after all – how about your colleagues?"

"Patted me on the back," James replied. His tone was a little bitter. "I know that me putting him there was good – it was better to take out them instead of them taking out thousands of civilians, but I can't help but think…"

"Do you regret it?" she asked quietly.

"Yes and no," James sighed. Now that Lily had him talking, he could concentrate on that instead of what he felt when he saw Peter. No, that wasn't Peter. It was just his corpse. _Corpse._ "I would have taken Peter, because I wouldn't want my children or anyone's children to live in terror. But he was a –"

"A friend," she said softly. "Do Sirius and Remus know?"

Dismally, James gave a slight nod before leaning his head back on the couch. "Sirius is already at a pub getting drunk as fuck and Remus is trying to work himself into unconsciousness."

"And why aren't you with either of them?"

"When we got married, they realized I wouldn't be with them as often, you know? They figured they would solve everything like they weren't the Marauders, I guess. I told you all my problems, you told me all yours – so I thought maybe we could just talk. Clear my head of everything. That kind of thing."

"I guess we could. What do you want to do?"

"I don't know."

"Do you want to take a nap or something? I'll show you into the guest room," Lily offered. "Or I could give you a backrub if you'd like."

"That'd be great," James yawned. They walked into a spare bedroom where James unbuttoned his collared white shirt, having some kind of undershirt underneath. Lily gently pushed him onto the bed, so that he lay on his stomach, as she began to gently knead his shoulders.

"Will you help me tell them?" James' voice came muffled from laying his head in his arms. "His parents and everybody?"

"Sure."

"Will you come to the funeral with me?"

"Of course." Lily kept roaming her hands across his entire back slowly, trying to smooth away the tension. There was a silence as the redhead rubbed each area of his back, before giving it a final stroke. "Done. How's that?"

"Good. Why don't I give you one?"

"It's fine," she replied. "Why don't I just leave you here for a nap?"

"No, really. I mean, you probably hurt yourself a little doing that for me. Let me at the very least, reciprocate."

So Lily lay down, stiff, when his smooth hands started to manipulate the muscles in her back. She forgot everything as he continued to rub her down, forgetting everything except for his hands stroking her. It felt _so_ good.

So she was a little startled when she felt feathery little touches on her back.

James was _kissing_ her back. At that moment, Lily hoped with all her might that he wasn't doing it on purpose, that he forgot he wasn't her husband, that they weren't romantically involved, that he wasn't using her to get past the grief.

But her heart knew that wasn't true. If he wanted to use her body tonight because of Peter, she'd let him. She had never completely been resistant to him, ever. He needed a friend tonight. Maybe a lover.

So why not her?

"James…" she shivered, as he continued to kiss the lower part of her back. "What – what are you doing?"

"Sh," he said, pausing in his little kisses. "Just give in…"

Lily was quiet for a moment. "At least sit down."

James obliged, and they sat there for a little while, staring at each other. Both had been breathing heavily, but now they evened out. Both could swear the other could hear the thundering of their hearts. Finally they both laughed, reminded of how their first night together had been.

"Come on, James," she said, smiling. "I think we'd feel more comfortable in my own room."

-&-

They didn't make it into her room. Instead, Lily was against the wall next to the door of her bedroom. He was kissing her, slow and deliberate, as her tongue came out to seek his. Their kiss got harder and faster, as they clung onto each other for balance.

Lily's body felt like it was on fire, and her lips were swollen from the welcome attack from James. Her hair was messy from having James run through it countless times during their kissing, and as they paused for breath, James whispered, "I want you."

She purred breathily when he started suckling on her neck. "Then take me."

Then all of a sudden, James stiffened. He stopped for a moment, before going back, but then Lily stopped him. "Why did you pause?"

James uncomfortably shifted. "I – I …can't do this."

"James," she said warningly.

He relented. "I don't want to _take_ you, Lily. I want to have you, like willingly – it's just stupid that I took notice of your wording. Whatever, okay? I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come over today. I'll see you another day, all right?"

And he walked out her door, leaving a hollow feeling in her heart.

-&-

A/N: Hehe, I know it's short, but considering school started (and being a freshman in such a big school) is so overwhelming, I figured I'd write something here. I'd like to thank people for checking out my FictionPress (like ShayeBecker :D) page, and if you haven't checked yet, I hope you will!

I've recently taken up a FictionPress project (since I have free periods I spend that time writing for my FictionPress story) named _Last Forever_. I have a cover created for it with a character list on my FictionPress, and I'd love for you to check it out! It's already written, but I'm still revising. I think it's a little corny. But anyway, check it out and see if you think it's good. :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Title: **Rekindle

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, sadly.  
**Genre:** Romance/General  
**Rating:** T  
**Summary: **Three years ago, Lily lost her son, home, money, husband, and dignity. She's still in the process of rebuilding her life, when she becomes a kindergarten teacher for young magical children. It doesn't help at all that her second marriage fails and she ends up teaching her son, Harry Potter.

-&-

_Now it ain't my style to have you guess how I feel about you  
I'm always thinking about you, I'm always talking about you  
Don't wanna let you know I have the words  
I end up all jittery  
And all the words I can't control what you do to me_

"Call Me Up" – Natalie

-&-

James had come over and then left on Friday, meaning she had the whole weekend to think about what to do. Lily had not, like James' body language had suggested, mulled over it after thinking about it after he left for a few minutes, and taken it in offense. She had been married to him once upon a time, after all. She could tell James had wanted her, but he had not wanted to seem like he was using her body to forget about Peter Pettigrew. It was times like these she was grateful she had love a man who took sex as seriously as she did.

Nor did Lily brood over how she was almost directly connected in Pettigrew's death. She remembered the boy – short, young, mousy; she had sensed a kind of naïveté in his demeanor. It was almost like he had a childlike malleability in him – whichever gave him the better benefits was how he was tempted. Lily almost felt uneasy about calling him weak, but she intuitively had known he was not as strong as Remus, Sirius, and James – and that Peter might one day grow up to look like a man, but he would never be one. Did she regret letting James know about Pettigrew? She never had – she had thought of it repeatedly – and she most likely never would. The last time she had seen him was when she said goodbye to him, after the divorce trial.

Whenever she thought of the Marauders, the first thing she thought of the things they had in common (excluding Peter) was their – it was not really _just_ bravery, or _just_ adventurousness – _audacity_ to do things like make fun of the professors, venture into places they were not allowed in such as the Forbidden Forest, or even turning Pettigrew in.

James, Sirius, Remus. All three of them were strong in different ways, Lily thought as she calmly prepared her materials in the classroom. It was a Monday, and in less than ten minutes, the young children would be coming in.

She couldn't think about them or anything worth telling right now. Her students would take notice, and then might become concerned themselves. She didn't want them to.

-&-

Lily was just sitting in her chair, reading a novel quietly when her doorbell rang. Opening it, she saw the last thing she would have ever guessed to have seen.

James was outside, holding a bouquet of flowers.

"James," she said. "Where's Harry?"

"Remus and Sirius took him to your parents'," he said. "I figured he'd want to meet his grandparents – I would have liked to introduce him to her myself, but they knew I had something else to do."

"Thank you, it means the world to them," she breathed. She was highly aware that they were standing less than an arm's length apart. Then she laughed lightly. "I bet my mother's spoiling him right now."

"Which would mean no harm, she's a stunning woman," he said. "But we're getting off track – these are for you."

She took the flowers, feeling a little awkward and stupid. "Would you like to come in?"

"That'd be nice, thanks," James said, stepping in. "Listen, I want to apologize for the other night. I had no right –"

"It's fine," Lily interrupted. "We were both consenting adults, meaning I wanted it too. We both did, and maybe it would have led to complications, so it was probably good that you stopped us from getting in too far."

"I just feel so embarrassed – I didn't want it to happen like that."

"So… you're saying you _did_ want it to happen?"

"Lily, I know you might not want to hear this, but," he paused, fidgeting nervously, "I want to try _us_ again."

-&-

After she had told James she would think about it, she hadn't seen him in a week. The most direct contact she had with him was Sirius picking Harry up after school.

"Hey Lils," Sirius said, "How was the little bugger today?" He affectionately ruffled Harry's hair.

"Fantastic, like always," she said, smiling. "Finally get through to your head you have a godson?"

Sirius laughed, sticking his tongue out. "I'm wasting time – James just wanted me to tell you that the funeral is this Saturday –"

Suddenly, the ease in the air left the room. Lily wasn't sure of which – the funeral or James – that had made her tense, but she managed to give Sirius a tight-lipped smile. "Of course, thanks for letting me know."

Sirius nodded, and after ushering Harry out of the room, he softly said, "I know what happened last week. And I know you might not be willing to be together with him considering what he did but –"

"Is there a point here?" she said weakly, trying to sound like she was laughing.

"I'm getting there," he paused. "He really went whack after the divorce – hell, if you go to his place you'll see all the spaces your stuff was in, they're still there. Hell, he still lets no one sit where you used to sit at the dinner table! When he read about your divorce, he was so hyperactive about it. He was nervous, and then he was not, and then he was happy, and then… he just really confused himself. I think he was thinking about taking you out, but then he realized you two weren't together anymore."

His words had felt like a pair of tongs, pulling and pulling on her lungs until she could scarcely breathe. She had no idea he had felt that way, and she never knew that he had felt that unstable.

"I don't know what to say, Sirius."

Sirius gave her a lopsided grin, before stepping forward to hug her and murmur, "Then don't say anything. Just please be there for him – I know he's an idiot but he loves you. And you love him. You two are good for each other. I mean, you did forgive him for him sleeping with someone else, didn't you?"

The ultimate question. She had always thought the moment would come, but this wasn't as climactic as she dreaded it would be. And surprisingly, she didn't feel any trepidation. She supposed some of it was due to Sirius's ability to ask things when most unexpected, but part of her realized it was herself who hadn't let herself feel any of that anxiety.

Or make her feel it.

Her nod to his question came almost a second later. Startled, she backtracked mentally. A nod? As in yes, she forgave him? But a large part of her wasn't as panicked about that admission as her self-doubting part. She realized a long time ago she had automatically forgave him, though she only now acknowledged it. She had forgiven him.

Sirius's eyes were watching her, as if knowing what she was thinking about. His eyes probed hers searchingly, looking for an answer, and she gave it readily. Sirius looked away from her, and he seemed taken back by the speed of her response.

"Tell him I'll be there." _And that I love him_, she added to herself.

"You bet," he winked, and said to Harry, "Let's get home quick. Your dad's going to be home in an hour, and we want to finish cooking before _he_ tries to cook, right?"

"You bet!" Harry said. He received a subtle nudge from Sirius, and added, "Bye, mum."

-&-

A/N: I know, I'm awful. Six months?! To write a page and a half?! I've been very, very busy and kind of unmotivated to write more. Like I really don't know where this story is going. It's supposed to be fluffy and short, except I don't have any concrete plans for it. Also, I turned FIFTEEN in February, yay! So now that you're done reading, click the purple button because then it will instill fuzzy feelings for you on the inside.


	10. Chapter 10

**Title: **Rekindle

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, sadly.  
**Genre:** Romance/General  
**Rating:** T  
**Summary: **Three years ago, Lily lost her son, home, money, husband, and dignity. She's still in the process of rebuilding her life, when she becomes a kindergarten teacher for young magical children. It doesn't help at all that her second marriage fails and she ends up teaching her son, Harry Potter.

-&-

_Now it's like a fairytale without a happy ending  
But then again, maybe we're just pretending  
Why does it have to be so unfair?  
Tell me that you care__  
I'm not over it  
_  
"Little Miss Obsessive" _– _Ashlee Simpson

-&-

Lily supposed it was fair – she _had _expected this subject to come up from one of her students' parents… the only thing, she supposed, was the parents addressing it so much later than she expected.

She looked up to see Mr. and Mrs. Granger, who looked a little serious and curious as well.

"So is it true that your son is in this class as well?"

"Yes, but I assure you, I do not favor any student above others."

Mr. Granger looked at her apologetically. "We're sorry to have asked you this outright, but we heard from all the other parents and had to wonder if it was true."

"I was a little surprised that this would be asked so late, halfway through the school year," Lily admitted, smiling to put the couple at ease. "I figured the parents would have clamored over each other to ask me it first."

"Well… as you know, we – we aren't like the other parents," Mrs. Granger said. "We moved here with our daughter Hermione only a little before she began kindergarten, at – I think it was – Dumbledore's request. But us, the parents, aren't … magical, like the others, so we haven't really talked to any of them – we only happened to overhear this from them."

"It's not that the parents aren't eager to make friends," Lily said, trying to sound reassuring. "It's just that the things they talk about are things Muggles – non-magical people – don't really understand or know about. I _can _tell you though – Hermione seems to be rather attached to my son Harry and the Weasleys' Ron."

"Oh, yes," Mrs. Granger smiled. "The Weasleys – particularly Molly – has been kind. She made us feel welcomed, and we're very proud of our daughter."

"You should be," Lily grinned. "She's one of the only students here with Muggle parents. She's extremely precocious. One of the good things is, at a school for young children like her, is that we're at the start of a new age. The pureblood – people who had magical parents – families are starting to be more tolerant of the half-bloods, which are people with one magical parent and one Muggle, and Muggleborns. These children have old-fashioned parents who are trying to be more accepting of the others, and the children are sent to school early, so that they learn tolerance at a much younger age. Nobody knew your daughter was Muggleborn, not even the parents, when they saw her with their children, until they saw her last name."

"It's just that we're a little uneasy. At daycare agencies before kindergarten, Hermione was often ostracized, you know?" Mr. Granger said. "We're extremely protective of her and we're afraid that she might stop believing that she being different can be a good thing. Sometimes… we're scared we might have made the wrong decision, letting her into a school like this. I mean, what if those little accidents weren't really magical?"

"They are," Lily said. "I've seen them, and they are accidental magic. This is the perfect school for all magical kids, whether their parents are magical or not. Even if your child really wasn't magical, our school is disguised as a Muggle school, so your child would have had the normal education for a Muggle."

"You're so informed about all this. I'm impressed. I must say, I didn't think a magical teacher would be so compassionate about all this."

"Well," Lily grinned widely. "I had Muggle parents too. Though I didn't get to go to this school, I _did_ go to an ordinary one. There, I was bullied, left out, the works. I always felt down on myself, believing that I'd rather be the same as everyone else than be laughed at for being different. For one, all the girls had either brown or blonde hair. I had red hair. Everybody called me 'Carrot Top.' _Then_, I got a letter to Hogwarts, which is a magical school for kids starting at age eleven. Dumbledore probably told you about it. Hogwarts was amazing for me. While I was criticized for having non-magical parents, I did excel because I wanted to prove that having magical parents doesn't really matter. Some people still called me names for my hair, but I remember a lot of the girls were jealous of my hair color."

"Sorry for being privy," Mrs. Granger blushed again, "but is that were you met Harry's father as well?"

She nodded. "We married after that, had Harry, and then divorced. But I assure you, I don't let seeing my ex-husband interfere with my job. We're pretty amicable, and any fights we might have will definitely be in private. I was in the magical newspaper a few times, lately, you see, about this whole 'scandal,' as they call it. It's not that big of a deal though – it used to be, because it gave the Potters a bad name when they discovered that my ex-husband had full custody over Harry. They used that to basically support Muggleborn rights. But now that I have partial custody over him, the excitement has went down a bit – and the security guards here make sure there are no people around here, hoping to take a picture of us or anything."

"Well," Mr. Granger said, as the two Grangers stood up. "Thank you for your time in addressing our concerns."

"No problem," Lily replied.

It wasn't as difficult as Lily had thought it would be, to be confronted. The parents hadn't even been particularly vicious, but she figured it was because the bits of gossip they had overheard hadn't been that vicious.

-&-

"I'm really still sorry about that," said James to Lily, when he came to pick Harry up. It was a day before the funeral, and taking James's advice, she was planning to remain as inconspicuous as she could, as it wouldn't do much good for either of them, if the press saw them together at a known Death Eater's funeral.

"It's really no big deal."

"It was," he reddened, "to my ego. I've never, ever left you like that."

She smirked, taking pleasure in his embarrassment. "I have."

"That's because you were a tease, back before we got married!"

Lily chuckled.

"If you don't mind my asking… how exactly did you, you know?"

The redhead smiled slightly at him. "Cold shower. You?"

"Same."

There was another pause, as Harry waited obediently outside of the classroom. James fiddled nervously with his hair.

"The funeral's going to end in the mid-afternoon. Do you… do you want to go somewhere after that with me?"

"Sure."

-&-

A/N: Check out some of my one-shots on my FictionPress page! I think the farthest I'm going with this thing is twenty chapters... I'm thinking fifteen right now.


End file.
